I find that, as an adult, a higher authority chafes a bit. When I am in agreement with the individual, I am all in, holding nothing back. When I am not, I begin a silent rebellion against authority, believing I could do it better. Fidelity and obedience have always been difficult for me when I was not in charge.
The more I care about the topic in question, the harder it is to follow. I had to pull my kids from an activity that they loved because the facilitator overlooked questionable behaviors from other members instead of addressing them. I homeschool my kids because I do not believe traditional school can meet the needs of my children the way I can.
Concerning the Church, my current pastor runs a tight ship. He is stern, and my boys respect him. He teaches by example, and troublemakers are addressed. There are no favorites, and there are no scapegoats. Everyone is on equal footing in the eyes of the pastor. I think Jesus is like that. There is love and understanding. There is mercy and justice. There is always another chance if a person is willing to make the change. But the person has to want to make the change.
It is not the healthy who need a physician, but rather those who are sick. Go and learn what this means: "I desire mercy, not sacrifice." I have come to call not the righteous but sinners.
Matt 9: 12-13